Paksworld

Though it’s tempting, in the current state of the world, to follow that up immediately with “As if…” actually I do always hope that tomorrow, next week, next month, and a New Year will see changes for the better.   And sometimes it happens.  Sometimes there’s a breakthrough, not only in science or technology, but in the hearts of individuals…and then those individuals’ internal breakthroughs propagate through those near them.  Not always, but sometimes.

What I hope for all of you reading this, in the coming year, are those inner changes that bring you closer to the person you were meant to be: a person with agency, a person with dreams and goals so exciting that you break through whatever has held you back (if anything has; some of you are full steam ahead already.)   I hope for all of you an environment that enables your growth.  Friends that care for you, and you for them.  Health, physical and mental, and health care for those times when health needs help.   Mentors, and mentees (if that’s the word): people who help you expand your lives and people who need your help to expand theirs.  Beauty, whatever beauty is to you–a view, a particular mug, a flower, a color that lifts your heart whenever you see it–indoors, outdoors, everywhere.   Enough of what you need, whatever that is.   More than enough, of love.

I am grateful for you, for others, for the natural world, for the cultures that lie behind us.  This world, this–as one of our prayers says–“our fragile island home.”

Let 2016 begin on the stroke of midnight in whatever time zone you’re in…but a new year begins every day.   May it be a good year for you.

So let’s start the year with a snippet.   This book is so spoilerific that it’s really hard to excise snippets that aren’t too…spoilery, but surely the first paragraph or two won’t hurt.  The book starts in Slotter Key nearspace, where Ky Vatta has come at the request (demand, more like) of her great-aunt Grace.

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Ky Vatta stared down at her home planet as her pinnace took her from Vanguard III, her flagship, to the lower-orbit space station where she would take a shuttle down to the surface. Once there, she would have to assume the role of Grand Admiral Vatta, homecoming hero of the recent war. But here, between the place she had made for herself, commanding Space Defense Force, and the welcome that awaited her, she had a short time to indulge her own feelings, as long as they stayed inside her head.
She did not want to be here. She did not want to be anywhere near Slotter Key. She felt nothing warm or sentimental about her home planet, the city she knew so well, the lost home in which she had grown up. She did not want the good memories to rise, because with them would come the immediacy and certainty of what had been lost.

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Now from personal experience, going back into a situation (coming home to a family, having a reunion experience) with this kind of bad attitude just about guarantees that it’s not going to be a straight shot to a joyous conclusion.   Ky could have opted for the “If they could see me now…” approach, been all gleeful about showing her accomplishments, going from disgraced cadet to triumphant admiral in just a few years.   In fact, even if you have a good attitude and expect everything to be fine and dandy…it’s often not what you expected (good or bad) and those expectations may get in the way of coping with the reality.   (I never expected a relative who claimed to be an avid birdwatcher to stomp along the boardwalk of a famous wildlife refuge full of rare birds, talking loudly the entire time: “I don’t see any birds; I thought there were supposed to be birds here–where are they?  Why is this place famous for birds anyway?  I don’t see any birds…”  Etc.  I was glared at by every real birder in the place as I attempted to escort (and quiet) the relative in question.  By the time we headed out on the second trail, word had spread–people as well as birds were fleeing into the bushes as we came in sight.  Had I known her idea of birding was watching birds at her feeder at home and realized how loud her voice was, I would’ve taken her somewhere else.)

I did mention to Ky that her attitude was not going to help, but Ky is, in this book, over 40 years younger than I am, and in some ways disturbingly like I was at her age.   Her annoyance with another character is very much like mine with the loud not-really-birdwatcher relative.  I was patient with birds I wanted to see, but not very patient with people.  OTOH Ky has skills I never had, and just to reassure you, I have never killed anyone, as she has.   I don’t think I’ve ever been willing to sacrifice good memories to avoid the bad ones.